The other topic Alf was big on was Beauty, especially the "Inner" variety.
(He was good at pronouncing capital letters.)
Wished I'd had my Fran Lebowitz with me:

"All God's children are not beautiful.
"Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.
"The most common error made in matters of appearance is the belief that one should disdain the superficial and let the true beauty of one's soul shine through.
"If there are places on your body where this is a possibility, you are not attractive — you are leaking".

Sledge